Drummer Boy
by IrishLeFay
Summary: Dee and Ryo attend a Christmas party at Ryo's aunt's that underlines the difference between the two men, but leaves them stronger with a better respect and understanding of each other.
1. Come, They Told Me

Disclaimer: The song The Little Drummer Boy is not mine

Disclaimer: The song _The Little Drummer Boy_ is not mine. FAKE is not mine (though if Ms. Matoh would like to give them to me as a Holiday gift, I'd surely not complain!); Lemony Snicket and his works are not mine. In fact, I don't own a damn thing! And if anything, writing this _costs_ me money.

Drummer Boy

Chapter One: Come, They Told Me

By: Irish

o – o – o –

"_Come, they told me_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_A newborn king to see_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_Our finest gifts we bring_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_To lay before the king_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_rum bah bah bum rum bah bah bum rum bah bah bum_

_So to honor him _

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_When we come"_

Dee had known something was up the minute Ryo had suggested Bikky spend the night at Lee's, blushing heatedly as he did. Nor was what was "up" Ryo. No matter what that blush implied. Dee could tell because Ryo wouldn't meet his eyes. Bikky had left, and Ryo had gone out of his way to "pamper" Dee. Unfortunately, that had involved Ryo making dinner. Dee loved his partner, and would never tell him how terrible his cooking was. He'd cleaned his plate of over-peppered, super-soggy spaghetti twice.

Dee was absolutely positive Ryo was up to something, when after dinner, he suggested they retire to their room immediately. Dee had gone to clean up quick, and when he came back, Ryo had been wearing the sexiest pair of underwear he owned, a pair of black briefs. The room was dark accept for a few candles and there was music playing. Honestly, Ryo might as well have taken out a billboard that said 'there's something I have to tell you that you aren't going to like'. Seduction just wasn't Ryo's thing. Not that he wasn't sexy, but he just had no natural smoothness, so it always came out staged. Dee generally found it very endearing. Tonight though, knowing something was up, endearing wasn't in the top five adjectives Dee would have picked.

"Okay, why don't you just tell me, Ryo," Dee said, leaning in the doorway in just his jeans.

"Tell you what?" Ryo tried to ask innocently. His gaze was anything but innocent though as it raked Dee's muscular frame, jeans unbuttoned and hanging off his hips, reveling the v of his torso and line of dark hair that tapered down to… Ryo cleared his throat.

"Whatever it is that you're hoping I'll accept more readily once you've befuddled me with sex," Dee replied, trying very hard to look through his lover, instead of at him. Annoyed as Dee was, it was almost impossible to ignore Ryo's smooth, pale, skin. Not to mention the early holiday package that had popped up under those briefs.

"Dee! It's not… I don't… okay well… but you see…" Ryo was backpedaling himself in circles.

Dee sighed, coming into the bedroom and shutting the door behind him. He sat down on the edge of the bed, turned towards Ryo. "Really, why don't you just tell me? Then we can deal with it and move on."

"Fine, Mr. Detective," Ryo grumbled. He sat up a bit more, leaning back against the headboard and drawing up his knees. It was a little chilly to be lying about naked. "It's about Christmas. My aunt is having her Christmas thing on Christmas Eve this year. I don't know why, but she is. I have to be there." Ryo paused, watching Dee's expression darken like and incoming rainstorm. This was not going to go well at all.

"You don't have to go. Nor will I be upset if you choose not to. I know that you take Christmas pretty seriously and that my aunt doesn't. I won't hold it against you for a second if you want to stay in the city and go to Mass." Ryo didn't fully understand himself. Although Dee was deeply spiritual and faithful, and general tacked that faith onto the Catholic structure because it was what he knew, Ryo didn't quite understand Dee's intense feelings about Christmas. He didn't give a flying monkey about Easter, which should have been a more important holiday if it was an issue of religion. Dee usually went to Mass at least once on Christmas Eve, sometimes even twice, and then again on Christmas day. The issue wasn't whether or not Ryo understood it, though; it was about what was important to Dee.

Dee looked at him a very long moment, then snorted derisively. "Oh bull shit."

"What? Dee, I'm not lying! I know how important Christmas is to you! I wouldn't be mad at all!" Ryo responded, offended that Dee would think that.

"No, I know _you_ wouldn't. Your aunt, on the other hand, will never forgive me. On the other hand, she'll never forgive me for coming either, so, I guess it doesn't matter." Dee shook his head, looking out the window. The snow in the city had been around for about a week, and was gritty and gray.

"Dee, she…" Ryo trailed off and bit his lip. "I don't think she means… I mean… maybe you take it all a bit too personally."

Dee opened his mouth, then closed it and shook his head, looking out the window again. After a moment he looked at Ryo once more. "I know you have to believe that, that she means no harm, I understand how she feels, believe it or not. However, personal or not, no matter what I do, she's going to comment."

Ryo just looked at Dee, not replying. Dee and his aunt and uncle didn't get along. Ryo had some fault in that. Part of it went back to when he and Dee were first partners, before they were lovers, and Ryo had spent a lot of time complaining to his aunt at length about his new partner. Ryo was also pretty sure that Dee just had a persecution complex about the situation because he felt out of place around Ryo's family. Dee tended to be both very insecure and rather classist towards the upper and upper middle class.

"I need to think about it," Dee said finally, unhappily. He glanced at Ryo again. "I suppose I should just blow out these candles, turn on the lamp and hand you your reading glasses and flannel pajamas?" Dee sighed.

"Don't tell me you're seriously still interested," Ryo raised a skeptical eyebrow. Dee opened his mouth once, shut it, and started over, apparently rethinking whatever his original response was.

"No, I suppose not," Dee said quietly. He reached over to the bedside table and handed Ryo his glasses and book, then got up and pulled Ryo's pajamas out of the drawer, tossing them onto the bed. He pulled on a shirt himself.

"Aren't you coming to bed?" Ryo asked, frowning. That was rather unlike Dee.

"Not yet,"

"Are you really that angry?"

"No, I'm not angry Ryo," Dee shook his head. "I just…" he shrugged, having no words to explain what he was feeling. He felt like he had been neatly maneuvered into a corner, and now all the options were bad. He _was_ still interested in having sex, craving the physical intimacy that he found soothing and as tangible evidence that things really were okay between them. He couldn't handle even a little cold shouldering from Ryo right now, without becoming retardedly anxious, and since Ryo was already doing a little of that… it was best just to be in the other room until Ryo fell asleep.

Ryo watched him a long moment, then his expression softened. "Come here," he murmured. "And take your damned clothes off, would you?"

Dee did as he was told, stripping out of the shirt he'd just put on and his jeans, pulling on some flannel pants instead. More appropriately dressed, he slipped under the covers with Ryo. When Ryo held open his arms, Dee went to them readily, curling up against Ryo's side, resting his head on Ryo's chest.

"Where's that book we've been reading from, hmm?" Ryo set aside his own book, and reached over Dee to the bedside stand, fishing around for fourth book in a children's series by a man named Lemony Snicket. They'd borrowed them from Bikky.

Dee sighed softly and closed his eyes, settling more as Ryo's voice washed over him, his scent, the feel of his skin and beating heart filled Dee's senses. It was soothing, calming. It was something Dee would do anything to keep. He would walk to the ends of the earth for Ryo with out even a moment of hesitation. He could certainly brave a family function. It wouldn't be the first Midnight Mass he'd missed.

- o – o – o -

"… the Baudelaire orphans were alive, and it seemed that maybe they had an inordinate amount of luck after all," Ryo finished about an hour later, closing the book and setting it aside. He looked down at the raven head of his lover. Dee had barely moved. Dee wasn't a reader, but he really enjoyed it when Ryo read to him. Ryo had actually gotten him a couple of audio books as gifts, hoping that Dee would take to them. He leaned down and kissed Dee's hair softly. "Are you still awake?" Ryo whispered.

"Yeah baby, I'm still awake. I think I liked the first and second best so far. Not that that one was bad. What's the next?"

"_The Austere Academy_, a word which here means severe and strict… Like Sister Mary Thomas," Ryo smiled as he felt Dee smile.

"Really? Because I was hoping it was a word that here meant sexy…" Dee teased, and Ryo felt the brush of his lover's lips against his chest.

"I don't think that definition would be appropriate for a children's book, nor accepted by most publisher and editors of dictionaries. However, I write neither children's books nor dictionaries, so, sexy it is," Ryo laughed softly, shivering under Dee's caress.

They made love slowly, tenderly. It wasn't always like that. All too often it was a quickie in the shower before work, at night they were often both too exhausted. Tonight, though, they found the energy, and it was more then worth it.

As they lay together afterwards, Dee spooned so protectively around his lover, he whispered. "I'll go,"

Authors Note: This is a mini story, which will probably be three or four chapters long. A little Holiday gift for everyone. My goal is to get it finished by the end of Christmas Day. Don't worry; I'm working hard on Ordinary Heroes too. I'm struggling to find a balance between the crime drama and the personal drama. I'm also hoping to get out another chapter of Redefining Heaven before I go back to school on the fourteenth, as well as another chapter of Blackbird (everyone should check that out, even if you aren't a Mercedes Lackey fan). Balkeirv is on the back burner, unfortunately. Also, keep your eye on my A/N I may post some of my original work The King's Man on my blog, if I do, I'll surely let you know. Happy Holidays!


	2. Poor Boy Too

Disclaimer: The song _The Little Drummer Boy_ is not mine. FAKE is not mine (though if Ms. Matoh would like to give them to me as a Holiday gift, I'd surely not complain!); Lemony Snicket and his works are not mine. In fact, I don't own a damn thing! And if anything, writing this _costs_ me money.

Drummer Boy

Chapter Two: Poor Boy Too

By: Irish

o – o – o –

"_Little baby _

_bah rum bah bah bum _

_I am a poor boy too_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_I have no gifts to bring_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_That's fit to give a king_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_rum bah bah bum rum bah bah bum rum bah bah bum_

_Shall I play for you_

_bah rum bah bah bum_

_On my drum"_

Dee sighed deeply, looking in the rearview mirror to brush his hair back out of his face and make sure he looked presentable. His stomach had been in knots since last night. Currently, there was nothing but coffee in his system, and that was helping neither his nerves nor his stomach.

"Relax Dee, it's going to be fine, you'll see. She doesn't hate you, I swear," Ryo patted his arm reassuringly. Dee managed not to roll his eyes.

"Well, if she doesn't actively wish me dead, she at the very least strongly dislikes me," he replied, wiping his hands on his jeans. He and Ryo both had dress clothes hanging in the back seat, but the party wasn't for a couple hours.

"Oh don't exaggerate, Dee. Come on, you can't stay in the car all night. You look very handsome. Maybe if you didn't play so tough around her… she'd see what I see," Ryo smiled softly giving his arm one final caress and stealing a quick kiss before he slipped out of the car.

"Problem is, babe… _I_ don't even see what you see," Dee murmured to himself. That's what he hated the most about being around Ryo's family. He expected rich white folks to treat him like dirt. He didn't like it, sure, but of all the things he'd experienced, one prissy lady's disapproval was hardly the worst of them. What Dee was afraid of is that whatever rose colored glasses that Ryo saw him through would finally come off. He was afraid Ryo's aunt was right, and that Ryo would realize it, and that Dee would lose him.

Dee got out of the car, grabbing their hanging clothes and overnight bags from the back seat as Ryo liberated the gaily-wrapped packages from the trunk. The Estate (as Dee thought of it) could have been the photo on the front of a Christmas card. A nice layer of virgin snow covering everything, the house had a colonial look to it, and gentle yellow lights glowed in the window as dusk grew. There was even a perfect red cardinal sitting on one of the snow-covered bushes in front of the porch.

Ryo hopped blithely up the stairs and knocked on the front door in warning before letting himself in. Dee followed at a far more sedate pace, stepping onto the welcome mat once Ryo had wiped his shoes, easing the door shut with his foot.

"Oh Ryo, you made it!" Elena called as she came into the entryway from the living room, all smiles until she laid eyes on Dee. "And I see you brought Dee! Wonderful!"

_And "wonderful" is a phrase, which here means: fuck off and die._ Dee thought to himself as Elena's smile grew stiff. If Ryo noticed any difference, he gave no indication of it, setting the presents down on the stairs before straightening to embrace his aunt.

"Of course I brought Dee!" Ryo laughed. "Santa Clause is a little out of my age range!" He winked at his aunt when she set him slightly aware from herself to look him over.

"Well, I'm glad you made it," Elena said, looking at only Ryo, making it clear whom she was glad about. Dee simply stood silently on the welcome mat, holding onto two garment bags and two messenger bags.

"It's a three hour drive, Elena, not a hike up Mount Everest," Ryo laughed. "Bikky decided not to come along, he's been with Cal and her family the last couple years, it's sort of become tradition for him. We always do our own little family thing afterwards anyway. The whole cop thing, we usually work." Ryo shrugged a little.

"That's okay, dear, whatever makes him happy, hmm? Here, come in, let me get you some cocoa. Dee, you know which room is Ryo's. Yours is right across the hall." Elena spoke to Dee for the first time, glancing at him briefly.

Dee's jaw dropped slightly. He wasn't even sure which part of what she'd said to be most offended about, the implication that he should just handle the luggage while her precious nephew had some cocoa, or that she actually expected him and Ryo not to share a room.

"Uh," Ryo started, but Elena had him by the arm and was already starting to drag him off. Ryo looked back at Dee over his shoulder and shrugged a little, giving him a pleading look. Dee had no problem interpreting what the plea was for. _Just play along, don't rock the boat, please?_

"Oh, Dee," Elena paused and glanced back at him again. Dee shut his mouth with a snap and managed to smile in what he hoped was a sweet manner, mouth tightly closed, remaining silent for fear of what he'd say if he spoke. "Take off your work boots."

_I'll take off your head, you bitch._ "Of course," Dee managed to choke out, still smiling sweetly.

"Elena, I hardly think—" Ryo started

"Tell me, how has work been?" Elena interrupted, resuming dragging Ryo off into the living room, leaving Dee in the tiled entryway with an armful of luggage, a step full of presents, and his work boots on.

Ryo's room was so gay. That had been Dee's first impression when he'd first seen it a year ago. It was the exact thought he had every time he'd entered it sense. Sure, it wasn't exactly feather boas and rainbows, but the posters were all of rugby and soccer players, sexy, sweaty, athletic men. The furniture was all made of light wood, and although the colors were masculine enough, blues and greens and tans, everything just had a flair of precision and perfection about it. It was cute. But Dee couldn't fathom how Ryo hadn't realized he was gay for so long.

Dee carefully hung their things in the closet, choosing to blatantly disregard Elena's implication that they wouldn't be sleeping together. If she asked, he would simply tell her that pink floral patterns, such as what graced the guest room, gave him seizures.

Instead of going downstairs, Dee sat on the edge of Ryo's bed, wondering if it had been the same bed he'd had in his room of his childhood home. Ryo had only spent his senior year in this room, but they still kept it for him. Dee was willing to not hate Ryo's aunt and uncle for that reason alone. Dee had no childhood room. He'd had a bed and a footlocker in an orphanage. So Ryo's room fascinated him. A space that was a three dimensional scrapbook of his life. Pictures of old friends and past pets, soccer and horse showing ribbons, trophies and medals, knick-knacks. There was even a little plaque that had Ryo's bronzed baby shoes mounted on it.

"Dee?"

Dee jumped a little, looking over his shoulder and offering a small smile at his lover who stood in the doorway, carrying two mugs of cocoa. "Hey baby. I put both our things in the closet. You know, where they belong… so maybe your aunt will stop trying to shove us in there too."

"You couldn't come up with anything better than a closet joke? You're losing your touch, Laytner," Ryo smiled wanly at him, coming over to the bed and handing Dee one of the two mugs.

"Tell me about it," Dee agreed, accepting the mug and taking a sip as Ryo sat down beside him on the bed. They were both silent for a long moment.

"What are you thinking?" Ryo asked finally, looking over at Dee and his brooding expression.

"You really want to know?"

"Of course," Ryo frowned

"Well… there's just one thing I want to know… when you were laying in this bed at night, and thinking about the Irish rugby team while you jerked off… did it seriously not occur to you even once that thinking about other men's pricks and all-male rugby orgies might make you the least bit gay?" Dee's tone was grave as he looked about the room again.

Ryo stared at Dee for a moment, then burst out laughing, a blush heating his cheeks. "Only you, Dee, only you… and it may have been a passing thought, but when I was jerking off thinking of locker room orgies my main thought was generally… oooh yeah… number twenty-nine! Uh…oh…yes!" Ryo moaned, doing a reasonable approximation of his own orgasmic moaning through embarrassed giggles.

Dee laughed, suppressing some rather erotic thoughts that Ryo's faux moaning immediately triggered. "Locker room orgies? Really?"

"Don't get any ideas, Laytner. You have your work cut out for you to keep me sated, do you really want to try and please multiple partners at the same time?"

"Who says I haven't already done so quite successfully?" Dee retorted, quirking an eyebrow. "And maybe I was thinking of having multiple partners pleasing _me_ for a change. Not having to do all the work. It'd be like my birthday."

Ryo gave Dee's shoulder a swat. "Pervert. And since when do you all the work? Where was I for you doing all the work? In fact, the last three times, I've been riding you like—"

"Ryo?" Elena called up the stairs.

"—a pure and saintly angel rides a heavenly chariot," Ryo finished with a chuckle and a blush.

"Heavenly maybe, but there is nothing pure, saintly or angelic about it," Dee laughed then sighed, his expression growing more serious as he glanced over his shoulder again at the door.

"Ryo?" Elena called again.

"Coming, Elena!" Ryo replied, before looking at Dee once more, giving his knee a squeeze. "I shouldn't have asked you to come, it wasn't very fair of me, was it?"

"It's fine Ryo," Dee smiled, "You're right, it's all in my head." Dee gently took Ryo's face in his hands and kissed his forehead.

"Dee—"

"Come on," Dee interrupted, taking his hand and drawing him out the door and down the stairs.

Ryo was getting very sick of people interrupting him every time he started to say something they didn't want to hear. Elena interrupted him every time he made an attempt to defend Dee or get Elena to stop treating him like hired help, and now Dee was interrupting him when he started to try and talk about the situation. He wasn't as blonde as Dee thought, and knew full well Dee hadn't been brooding about what Ryo's teen sex fantasies had been. He was upset, but doing his macho keep-it-all-inside-so-you-don't-have-to-worry-your-pretty-little-head-about-it routine.

Dee was normally so good about making sure they remained equals and partners, despite what conventions suggested given their rather ridged roles during sex. Every now and then, though, he pulled this crap. Ryo forgave him, of course, because Dee was trying to be sweet, not trying to be a jerk.

Ryo took Dee's hand and laced their fingers together as they tromped down the stairs. Elena was waiting for them at the bottom, and Ryo was determined that at the very least she'd come to recognize Dee as the man Ryo loved, and accord him respect for that if nothing else. Elena's eyes did flick to their clasped hands, her lips pursing a bit, but she made no comment on it.

"Ryo, would you come help me put the finishing touches on the tree, you have such a good eye for finding the bare spots," Elena said with a slightly stiff smiled.

"Of course, and Dee can reach the high spots," Ryo replied cheerfully, not letting go of Dee's hand when he felt Dee balk a bit. "Since uncle Frank isn't exactly the tree-decorating sort,"

"Wonderful," Elena replied, turning back toward the living room. Ryo was starting to suspect that Elena was using "wonderful" in the same way people from the Midwest used "special".

Ryo stood back and admired their handy work. The tree looked beautiful. It wasn't the kind of tree he preferred and remembered from his own childhood, the kind that was a riot of lights and where most of the ornaments were ugly homemade affairs, usually some sort of childhood craft involving Popsicle sticks. This was a Martha Stewart kind of tree. Tasteful white lights, elegant glass and crystal bobbles. No Santa Clause water skiing in Bermuda shorts, no popcorn garlands or conglomerations of glitter, glue and Popsicle sticks. It was still beautiful in it's own way, though.

Dee had helped them reach the higher branches, and had given Ryo a boost to put the star on the top, but after that, he'd disappeared again. Since he had, Elena hadn't stopped talking down about him.

"I mean, really dear, I know he's easy on the eyes, but there's more to finding a… a… b-boyfriend than that," Elena said, shaking her head a bit as she put away the packaging the ornaments had been in. At least she was managing to acknowledge that Ryo was gay and had a boyfriend (though Ryo wasn't fond of that particular term) not a "special friend".

"He is very easy on the eyes, and you're right, there is far more to finding a significant other than just what he looks like. Fortunately," he turned to his aunt, giving her a stern look. "As I keep telling you, his external packaging is but a pale suggestion of the man he truly is."

"You're just smitten with him, Ryo. It's just an infatuation. Don't confuse lust with love," Elena replied. Ryo couldn't tell if she was willfully not taking his hint, or if she was actually missing it.

"I'm not. I happen to be experiencing both. I'm not fifteen, Elena, I'm not even twenty, I'm thirty-two! I'm a grown man with a career, a child, and matching tableware. I'm even allowed to undertake contracts and legal obligations on my own behalf!" Ryo sighed deeply, sitting down on the arm of the couch. Maybe if he admitted he could see Dee's flaws…

"Listen, I know he isn't perfect. In fact, he drives me crazy a good third of the time. I'm well aware that he is rough around the edges. He can't sit still, he's under-educated, he smokes, he swears like a pirate hooker, he's too blunt, too forward, he doesn't know his salad fork from his soup spoon… but that doesn't make him a bad person. No, you'll never be able to train him to be a sweet little lap dog. That's not who he is. He's like… a big dumb sheep dog! No matter what you do, he's going to knock things over with his tail and bark at the wrong time." Ryo sighed. "But Elena… do you know why he came? He knows how you feel about him. He's not oblivious and I assure you, he catches every one of your subtle jibes. He chooses to ignore them for me. He came along, despite knowing he'd be miserable every damned moment, solely because I asked him. If that's not a gesture of love, I don't know what is."

Dee let the door swing shut, turning away from it, both arms coming around his waist. Pirate hooker? Dumb sheep dog? Well, it wasn't an inaccurate assessment. He could be clumsy, and loud, but didn't Ryo know how hard he tried not to be? Dee moved further away from the door as Ryo continued his soliloquy and got his jacket from the closet, pulling on his "work boots" before slipping out into the cold night air.

The snow crunched under his feet as he moved over to Ryo's car, leaning against the hood as he lit up. His heart felt like it had sunk down into his stomach and lodged like a fist-sized rock. Dee had always worried that some day Ryo would see the truth of him. The uneducated pirate-hooker-sheepdog truth. Apparently Ryo was fully aware of all that. Dee wasn't sure what good traits could be found in him after that assassination of his character. He couldn't even refute any of it. It was enough to make Dee wish desperately for a hole to fall into and never come out again.

Dee finished smoking his cigarette and went back inside before he froze into a Deesicle. Ryo had apparently finished talking to his aunt, because Dee could hear him in his bedroom, getting ready as he came up the stairs. Dee didn't really want to face him, but considering that Ryo was likely to be his only friend and ally anywhere in the house tonight, he'd have to at some point. Dee took a minute and put on a brave face before entering the room.

"Hey there, good looking," Dee grinned, giving Ryo's ass a grope as he passed him, heading to retrieve his things from the closet. Ryo jumped a little.

"Hands off the goods, Laytner, you break it you buy it," Ryo retorted, pulling an undershirt over his bare chest.

"Well shit, I'd better be good, because I sure can't afford to buy the cow if I stop getting the milk for free." Dee smirked.

"Yeah yeah, I'm so easy," Ryo rolled his eyes. "You better get ready."

Ryo shrugged into his dress shirt, watching Dee out of the corner of his eye as Dee started to get ready. Dee's groping of his ass and sex-teasing had immediately cued Ryo in that something was wrong. Not that Dee didn't frequently grope and tease for other reasons, but it was the tone of it, the loud brashness. Ryo didn't know if Dee consciously telegraphed emotional distress in this way, or if he'd simply learned how to speak "Dee", but that something was wrong was very clear. You couldn't ask Dee straight on, though, if he was upset. He'd never admit it.

Ryo thought quietly, sitting down on the stool that matched the vanity in his room. It had been his mother's vanity. She'd always had very long black hair, and Ryo could remember sitting on the floor watching her brush it. He angled one of the three mirrors a bit, so he was able to watch Dee undressing behind him as he ran a brush through his hair.

"Is something on your mind, Dee?" Ryo asked as though he were idly curious.

"Huh? No, nothing but the sound of the ocean," Dee responded as he dropped his jeans. He was facing towards Ryo as he did, yet another sign something was wrong. Dee was one of the only people Ryo had ever known who would undress facing you. The only reason he'd noticed it at all was because it had made him terribly uncomfortable before they were officially a couple. After the first time they'd had sex, Dee had started turning away from him to undress. It seemed absolutely bass-ackwards, until Ryo realized it was a trust issue. When Dee turned away, bare and vulnerable, it was a sign of trust. Not one he was showing now.

Then again, Ryo reflected, as he appreciate the trail of dark hair that started just above Dee's navel and disappeared under the waist of black y-fronts, maybe Dee undressing facing him wasn't all bad… not all bad at all. Dee had such and amazing body. Amazing enough that not even the tattoo of the archangel Michael slaying a demon tattooed on Dee's upper thigh was enough to detour Ryo's sexual thoughts.

"If you weren't so hot, I think you'd have seen a lot less action since you got that tattoo." Ryo observed, completely sidetracked from his worries about Dee's emotional state.

"You think?" Dee looked down at his thigh. "Angels don't make you horny?" he smirked.

"On the whole? No. On you… maybe a little," Ryo smiled a bit, meeting Dee's eyes on the vanity mirror. He'd gotten that tattoo after the shooting-exploding experience at Bikky's school. They'd found out later that the bullet had almost severed his femoral artery. He would have bled out, if it had, maybe even before Ryo had reached him.

"Oh yeah?" Dee smirked and sauntered closer, running his hands over Ryo's shoulders and chest from behind.

"Mmhmm," Ryo took his hand and kissed it softly. "We're both going to have to keep it in our pants, though, until everyone leaves again." He took up one of Dee's hands, kissing his palm softly. "I love you."

Dee's green eyes showed a flash of suppressed hurt and anxiety before he managed to slam his wall back up, and retort with a sassy grin. "Of course you do. What's not to love about someone who can make you come three times in a row." Dee leaned down and nipped with a faux-playfulness at his ear, before trying to move over to where his clothes were hanging.

"Stop it, Dee!" Ryo snapped, surprised at his own sudden vehemence. He hated it, _hated it_, when Dee reduced what was between them to sex. He hated even more when Dee did it in such a way that implied the only reason Ryo was with him was because he was good in bed.

Dee actually jumped, and jerked his hand away from Ryo's, his expression as unreadable and unyielding as stone. Ryo stood abruptly and stormed passed Dee, opening the door roughly just enough to make sure they were alone upstairs, before shutting and locking it again, whirling towards Dee. In those brief seconds, Dee had managed to pull his jeans back on.

"I don't just keep you around for sex!" Ryo hissed. "I'm not just infatuated with you because you're gorgeous and very… skilled… I'm not so stupid or shallow that I can't differentiate between my dick and my heart! I love you, damnit!"

"Okay, baby," Dee replied without inflection.

"No! Don't you 'okay, baby' me! Don't placate me! Do you think I'm too stupid to know the difference?" Ryo's hands were fisted at his sides, Dee's stance was one of ready wariness, his weight on the balls of his feet.

"Of course not," Dee replied immediately, still without expression or inflection.

"Then why say it?" Ryo demanded. He was reading Dee's tense body language, but suddenly didn't care. He was sick of being condescended to, no matter what Dee's intentions were.

Dee was silent, his eyes looking at a spot just over Ryo's left shoulder.

"Well?" Ryo demanded.

Dee's silence nor gaze didn't waiver. No expression could be found, even around the corners of his mouth or eyebrows. There was nothing there. Dee could have suddenly turned into a carved statue.

"Yeah, sure, easier to shut down than to answer. Fine. Well screw you, Laytner. And the horse you rode in on!" Ryo turned sharply on his heel and strode out of the room. The minute he shut the door behind him though, he felt his face flush with guilt. His temper had run away with him. Dee was upset about something, and instead of finding out what, Ryo had let Dee's obnoxious defense do exactly what it was built to do… push him away, make him angry, to keep him at arms length, an attempt by Dee to protect himself emotionally. Ryo was about to turn back and apologize, get to the bottom of what had Dee so on edge, but from the stairs, his aunt was calling him. He had finished getting ready, and then the doorbell rang. Promising himself he'd make it up to Dee, Ryo went downstairs to help greet the first guests.

Authors note: So, remember that part where this was supposed to be a Christmas story? Ha! Oh well, hopefully you'll enjoy it out of season anyway! Oh, and the version of "Little Drummer Boy" I'm using is by Jars of Clay, it's excellent.


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